I got on a train.
There was an old lady in my seat. The seat I had bought a ticket for. Stunned, I hurried out and checked if I was in the wrong coach.
Nope, I was right.
I went in and checked the seat number again. Yup, I was right again. Approaching the old lady, I asked her and her husband (probably) if that was her seat. Her hubby (let's call him that) showed me their tickets and yup, I was right once more. That was my seat. Hers was just to the right side of his hubby, though separated by the walkway.
The old lady got up immediately to get to her actual seat. Part of me wondered if they had known, but just wanted to sit together. Well, I didn’t mind. I told her it was alright and suggested to swap with her. They were happy. Hubby put a hand on my shoulder with a squeeze and whispered,
“Thank you.”
I'm happy, too.
I
That was an event I encountered on a train ride from home. I noticed how being on a long ride like this, especially when I'm alone, prompts a lot of good stories to write about. That was one of them.
As I sat on my new seat, I thought about a teacher of mine — one who taught me Further Math in A-Level and some great lessons in life.
He was the kind of guy who would thank the janitors whenever they came to clean the classroom he was in. A simple task like changing the rubbish bag would get a "Terima kasih, kak (thank you, sister)” from him. He always received a lovely "sama-sama (you're welcome)" from them.
As unusual as it was, I could see it made the janitors’ day. It made mine, too.
II
It was the year 2021.
I was walking along a long link bridge from my college dorm to the library (probably). It was morning. The sun was shining but not so much that it was blistering. It was a long walk — the kind you could see someone walking towards you from afar. So could the other person.
My introverted self would always feel awkward here. Approaching a person head-on, while you still have some distance between each other, is...weird. It's even worse when it's someone you know. Or kinda know. You want to talk but you can't because of the distance.
So what can you do? Just keep walking and staring at each other. Or walk faster while trying to look at the weird clouds in the sky or your phone for the time.
You get what I mean...right?
This was one of those moments. There was someone in front. I didn’t know him, nor was he walking towards me face-to-face. It was an old janitor sweeping the floor. Probably in his late 40s or 50s.
My introvert power activated, so I chose to go past him with a smile at most, as a sign of courtesy. Well, I was wearing a mask (we were still in a pandemic, remember?) so he couldn't have seen it anyway. Anyhow, it was awkward.
Slowly, we were getting closer.
Slowly, we were approaching each other's "talk zone".
Okay, look at the side. Look at the trees and the birds passing by.
Get ready for the smile. For the squinting eyes to show your smile (behind the mask).
Five more meters.
Four more.
Three.
Two.
“Good morning!” said the old man with a bright grin.
I returned the greeting. That day became one of my good days with a good start.
III
Fast forward to 18 January 2024. As I write this story, the Mitsuha’s theme from Your Name was playing in the background. It is a special song — one that makes me think of encounters. Those with strangers that happen all the time and end with a tinge of bittersweetness, sometimes.
I used to listen to it during some of the nights in A-Level, when I would stroll around the campus with earbuds on. There would be very few people around. As if you were all by yourself in this world.
But it also reminds me that there are other people. People who, too, have their own lives. Their own worries. Their own stories.
Sonder.
I mentioned it back in a review of The Travelling Cat Chronicles by Hiro Arikawa.
The feeling one has on realizing that every other individual one sees has a life as full and real as one’s own, in which they are the central character and others, including oneself, have secondary or insignificant roles.
What does it have to do with those stories? The train event? My teacher? The old janitor?
I guess, sonder is a unique feeling. One that could make someone kinder. When you stop thinking about the world revolving around you, or rather, when you realize that everyone "has a life as full and real" as your own, you may feel...well, sonder.
You will probably have a desire to be kind, too. Because having lived your "full and real" life thus far, you probably knew it hadn't been easy. If others have been living their own “full and real” lives, surely they would feel the same and deserve some kindness you would like to receive yourself.
And I must say, kindness is infectious.
The kind appreciation that my teacher showed to strangers.
The “Good morning!” from the old janitor with a bright grin.
The old hubby who thanked me for the seat.
They spread kindness. It led me to be more willing to overcome my self-imposed social anxiety (sometimes) and try to greet strangers. I did a few times to some janitors before at my university, and they always returned the greetings with a smile.
The Mitsuha’s theme song reminded me of the event on the train. The latter then led me to revisit the two stories, one of my teacher and the other of the old janitor.
I guess I just want to say,
If your “Good morning!” can make someone's day, don't waste it.
—Thomas🦙
P.S.
I'm not sure if I did this story justice since it’s almost 2 am (ouch). I made some bad decisions yesterday that led me to this. It didn’t feel great trying to rush writing, especially when doing it late at night. Hope it still turned out well.
And yes, good morning to you :3
🏆 Weekly Gold
Each week, I share something I found interesting with you. It could be a song, a book, a quote, or a YouTube video that blew my mind.
Here’s the gold this week 👇
Get good sleep.
Can’t remember if there’s any gold this week, so I just made one myself. It’s a small reminder to get good sleep, because many things, if not all, fall apart with the lack thereof.
Sure, there will be times when it’s worth more to go to bed late. Like having a chat with a friend you haven’t seen for ages, writing a blog post *cough* or bringing your “explosive diarrhea-ing” cat 🐈 to the vet. Never experienced the last one. Never want to.
But on other nights, if you can get good sleep instead of doom scrolling or the like, do it. Because many things — health, opportunities, relationships, etc. — fall apart without it. Doom scrolling isn’t worth sacrificing those things.
Zzz I should sleep now.
Other credits:
Cover photo by JuniperPhoton on Unsplash